There is a story behind that monstrous slab of hair on his upper lip. The reason why he grew his mustache out so much was to hide his STD collection. That's right. Ever since high school, he has collected STDs on his upper lip; I only know this because I saw his collection right when it became obvious, but before he could hide it with a fake mustache (in 11th grade). He later grew his 'stache out enough to get rid of the fake one, but now you know. There's so many STDs in there I don't even want to think about it.
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